Have you ever noticed, when you read and re read a word more than 5 or 6 times, it looses its meaning? For that certain moment (and this is a cliche sentence) you question its existence -why do those the words exist? That, say, for example, “quote” -why q-u-o-t-e is written in that way? Where does its meaning derive from? Then, your eyes begin to separate the “q” from the “u” and the “o” and “t” and “e”.
Its just this very thought and observation that makes me question not just these words or sentences, or pages books and novels – when I expand this thought to people, nature, places – the whole world, it doesn’t make sense to me in the same way as it does for words.
As you may have noticed, I am a very direct person, usually, my posts and other updates are not based on deep thinking. In fact, I try to avoid this deep thinking. Whenever I have a certain thought as mentioned above, I don’t try to think further. I just want to stop thinking for that brief moment – I start humming, thinking about different things (food I guess) or even start singing to distract my thoughts. (and I don’t have anyone to discuss it with because, to be honest, everyone has their own opinions and they usually never understand – then again, it might be my way of conveying the message ?).
And then its because it doesn’t make sense. We have scientific facts, then we have religious and earthly facts. Do you ever stop for a second, close your eyes and wonder that – You. Its you, existing in the very moment (not talking about time here – ignore time – time doesn’t exist) capable of everything yet nothing? (as in, there are limitations of course – you can’t fly). But still, you DO exist. Your presence, you recognize your presence in that moment.
I am going to loose my head one day just because of this. This world and other worlds and everything else around me. The way we think, expressions, smiles, thoughts – its never ending. Like when you are alive and you breathe constantly to stay alive. Well, duh, obviously, to stay alive you have to breathe but we live because we are breathing – wait, a better example. our hearts, beating every 0.08(?) seconds. Basically, well, something you can’t control. Similarly thoughts. And its these thoughts. In fact, sometimes it becomes a train of thoughts and the originality of the thought is lost.
Sorry, really, if I don’t make sense. Or if I made half sense and gave you a headache (that was totally not my intention :S)
Thank you for reading if you made it till here 🙂
If not, well, I understand.